Why can't.....

We have it all? I've been a bit of a debbie downer lately, with associated personal and career issues as of late, so I've been internalizing and compartmentalizing, and now I'm ready to focus on something else. This is going to be a bit of a depressing post, so fair warning on that. But hopefully, by me getting it off my chest, I'll feel better about it and more positive. Everything that I'm posting today is going to be discussed with an objective outsider on Wednesday, and I'm really hoping that will help.

It's no secret that my current work environment isn't ideal....don't get me wrong, I love my job and I love the physical building I work in. My boss pretends I don't exist most days, and all I get are corporate mumbo jumbo e-mails from her maybe every other day. I've been looking for jobs for most of this year, and finally had a couple of interviews I was very excited about. I really have no desire to move out of this city just yet, but I can't keep complaining about the same things without doing anything to fix them. So, since I've tried talking with my boss, HR, the GM to try and get the situation resolved, the only other options are A: Out of the department, B: Out of the hotel, C: Out of the company, or D: Out of the city. After much thought over these options, I decided the best one was to be out of the city. Well, there was a job in the department at a different hotel here, but I didn't get that. Nor did I get the other two that I just applied for. Which has certainly not helped this feeling of utter rejection in pretty much every aspect of my life.

Now, due to the rejection of my previous living arrangement, I've signed another year lease here in the Crescent City. Not that I'm not excited about it, but now, not only do I feel rejection, I feel trapped. I'm in a neighborhood I like, with a roommate I'm pretty good friends with (but not too good), and I no longer have the stress of having a week and a half to find a place to keep me from being homeless. Now I know the only person I have to blame for that is myself, but it still sucks to actually get to that point. Especially when some of the circumstances that led to that point weren't completely within your control, and perhaps a little understanding and reassurance would have helped instead of avoidance and being a jerk. But I digress. We'll have our electricity turned on tomorrow, so I won't be sleeping by myself, in a house with no lights after today. I may actually even unpack this time.

In any event, despite all of the crappy things that were happening to me (work, life, family, etc.), I found some sort of solitude and even dare I say happiness making out with a boy that I've been friends with for a while. Two months of laughter, cuddling, bar hopping, football watching, cartoon introduction and some other things, have now (hopefully not permanently) been taken away from me. And I'm really not sure why. The pause timetable is about a month, but after a month of being "just friends" after not being "just friends", I'm uncertain I'll want to go back. Which is why time is of the essence here. I'm trying not to freak out and be all girly (failed over the weekend, pretty miserably, actually), but I really don't know what I did or didn't do that was wrong. There was never any pressure for a relationship, or titles or any of that other crap that society forces on two people. So long as we weren't doing anything with others that we were doing with each other (naked, obviously), and we were still having fun hanging out too, what was the problem? This is what I don't understand about men: I was offering everything that most men would kill for: no strings per se, time to do your own thing, as much usage of the "benefits" as you'd like, no titles, just a promise to communicate. If you want out, just tell me. I guess that's the answer.....He did. I just want to understand why. Apparently there's a fear of hurting me, because he "at least" wants to be friends. But, he's already hurt me. So why can't we just forget the last week, and go back to the last two months and have it all? Ugh....stupid me.....always overthinking everything.

The last thing that's been eating at me has been family related. Not that I saw my siblings and nephews a ton when I lived at home, living 1300 miles away has taken a toll on me that I never expected. When I hear that I'm R's favorite aunt, having not have seen him more than twice in the last year, I realize all that I'm missing out on because I was too selfish to just stick it out in Minneapolis for a while. Am I happier than when I left? No. Am I any sadder than when I left? No. It's just different and it sucks to not be able to hang out with my sister because I'm having a bad day. Compounding this frustration and sadness, is the issue with my mother, which I won't get into to far. I haven't spoken with her since July. This was my choice and the last possible resort to deal with a situation that's been festering pretty much since I can remember. This particular person has been given a pass for far too long simply because she gave birth to me. Anyone else would have been out of my life long, long ago. This is the most I've discussed with anyone, and so I shall leave it for another day. I can't say it's been eating at me, because I really haven't dealt with it at all since July, but I know it's there, and I know it needs to be fixed. Of all the relationships in my life that are in various stages of disarray, I know I need some resolution with this one. At the end of the day, family is more important than anything, and as much as I'm hurting about a boy, a job, finances and other things, this one is far and away the worst.

I'm going to really put more effort into this, now that I'll have a home environment that doesn't make me want to leave the house every moment that I'm awake. I've got some saved that I have to re-read, so that should keep me going for a couple weeks. There are some super fun events that I want to fill in, but I'll get to those as I can. I know I'm not alone in the thoughts above....whether you're there now, or will be or have been. I need to stop with the self loathing and melting down (though N says I've only done that a handful of times in the 12 years I've known her), and just be grateful for the things and people I do have. My dad coming next month, my siblings, their families, my friends, two months of bliss here and there, my health (though that's been questionable as of late), a job that I love, a beer named after me and new sunglasses. Now I can get back to pretending I'm Corey Hart. Maybe that's what's been missing.

Reflecting.....

Here I sit, three weeks before I fly home to celebrate(??) my entrance to my 30's. I've been thinking a lot, about where my life has taken me, about my current situation, and about what the future might hold for me. I should be excited about all the opportunities life has sent my way, and I should be thrilled to celebrate all these things with my family and closest friends. And instead? I'm just kind of indifferent. Maybe that's too harsh of a word. Ambivalent? I don't know. I'm at a point that I just don't know.

I think about my sister, getting married to her best friend. I think about my brother, with his two beautiful children and gorgeous fiancée. I think about my other brother, doing exactly what he's wanted to do his entire life, and with his beautiful girlfriend. And then I think about me. Married to my job. Single. Childless. Me. Sitting here, in a city with no family, no one that I trust implicitly, and at a job that I adore, working for someone I pretend doesn't exist. Seems empty, just like it always has.

Before you feel bad for me, don't. I'm going to Mexico in a month and a half, an opportunity only afforded to me because I don't have all these...attachments....I pay rent, but my landlord doesn't mind if my rent is a day or three late. I don't have kids I have to arrange for. I have a job that allows me to take the time off when I want to, because they know I NEED to. I've been afforded a ton of AMAZING opportunities in life that I wouldn't trade in for anything. But the thought of turning thirty and not being exactly where I want to be, not completely, well, it makes me think.

My 5 year plan five years ago, was to be turning 30 and living in the Big Apple. Instead of the Big Apple, I'm living in the Big Easy. I didn't have grand plans to be a department head or director at the age of 30, but I wanted to be making more money than I am now. I have an opportunity to accomplish that, but I'm not sure exactly how I feel about it. More to come on that in the coming weeks. I didn't plan to be married, or settled down, or anything domestic, but I didn't plan to be single. I know that for that to happen, I have to adjust the way that I live my life, and I'm just not quite ready to do that. If I was, I'd be a department head at work. I absolutely adore my life the way it is - I do what I want to do, when I want to do it, and I can't fathom life without that freedom.

I certainly didn't plan to be living where I am, but I'm doing what I can to make the most of it. I enjoy my kickball teams, and the people that play/watch/drink with us. I've found some really great restaurants and some killer bars, though I'm still trying to find egg rolls as good as Que Viet, and Thai food as good as Tum Rup. There's a pretty amazing music scene here and my friends come to visit me in droves. I like it here. The humidity can suck it, but overall I'm content with the decision to move here.

Given the amount of fun that I'm having, and the things that I'm learning about myself both personally and professionally, and what I want to accomplish here, it's baffling me the thoughts that I'm having of moving back home. I know how much I hate winter, but do I hate winter as much as I love and miss my family slash friends? There's a job open that would challenge me on several levels, but there are many reasons I wouldn't want it. Maybe in another 5 years, when they figure out what to do about winter, I'll move home.

So, for now, I will continue to balance the social with the professional, and try to not dwell on the feeling of emptiness that I have, because I know that I'm the only person that can change it, and for right now, I'm not willing to do that. When I am, I'll know. I think. Or maybe I won't, and it'll just hit me in the face and I'll just have to accept it. I've lived a life of no regrets and I'm not about to start now. And who knows? Maybe this will become my home. A place I never expected, never planned for....just was. Wouldn't that be something?

Month Complete.

Hard to believe today is Feb 1st kids. It's true what they say: the older you get, the faster time goes. It's super hard to believe that I'm going to be 30 in just over three months. Time's going to fly. It looks like I'm going to book my ticket home this week (or maybe I'll wait a couple until I get my bonus).

This weekend was a blur. Friday night was the going away party for my counterpart at work. Holy shinkes was it a good time. I was tasked with coming up with a speech to 'roast' him with, and it turned into a top ten list that ended up being pretty good. Turns out I am funny when I'm sober. Whodathunkit?

Saturday started out as a train wreck, and finished up much the same way. I was supposed to take a friend to the airport early in the AM, and as it turns out, going to a going away party the night before is not conducive to getting people to the airport at 6. I hope someday she forgives me.

Then we had our kickball game. It was a makeup from the previous Monday. Leaving the Frat House while it's still daylight...it's an interesting phenomenon. We all kind of had our Varsity Blues moment, but it was still the same day. After the kickball festivities wound down, we headed off to the sinkhole. The story of sinkhole will need it's own post....it's a good one. After a few hours of sinkhole, we walked to Juan's Flying Burrito. Dee. Lis. Cious. Then onto Parlays for a kickball party...and Sunday was a day of recovery.

It's been a good start to the month, kids. Let's hope it continues.

Well....

I was contemplating writing a really morose post about the hell that has been my life the last two days. Instead I shall leave you with a cymbal playing monkey.

California Dreamin.....

Yup, I'm in Cali. Hoping that my travel day on Sunday will allow me to get y'all caught up on the last few days of my parents visit as well as a recap of this AMAZING training class I attended.

I'm a little annoyed the sun isn't out yet, but guess what? I'm in SoCal and you're not.

A moment of calm

And I want more. It's been a crazy week of work and play and it's done. Well, almost....

Half of my parents arrived on Tuesday. Wow. It's hard to believe it's been two months since I've seen them. I met them at their hotel and many hugs were had, their travel plans were discussed and dinner locales were tossed about. We ended up at Port of Call, one of the better burger joints in the city. I have a wildly different palate than my mom and step-dad, so a burger place seemed like it would be pleasing to all. And it was. Wow. Seriously good burgers there.

After dinner we walked around the Quarter for a bit and then up Frenchman street and back to the car. We drove up Esplanade and then over to Uptown, showing them the St. Charles streetcar line and where I'm thinking about moving to (when my lease is up, of course). I dropped them off after our drive and went home.

Wednesday I picked them up and we made our way to Cafe du Monde. I've had a fair share of beignets here, and I've been by The Cafe, but never bothered to stop in. Too touristy, too crowded, too much to look at elsewhere in the quarter. It was magnificent. Really truly amazing pastries. The coffee was meh, but most coffee is.

We drove around the places we went Tuesday night, to see them in daylight. I gave them the grand tour of my abode and then I went into work. Oh, how I wish I wouldn't have. I won't discuss it here, but suffice to say that one of the biggest challenges I've had since I moved hasn't been the adjustment to a new city or the lack of friends or even the job itself. If you've spoken with me in any capacity in the last 5 months (has it really been that long?!?!), you know. Basically, I like throwing stones at hornet's nests. But you knew that about me.

After work, we grabbed a bottle of wine and hit up a local pizza joint to watch the Twins game. All was going well until the end of the game of course. Thursday brought a day of pampering....from manicures to ice cream to prosciutto and pedicures, to more wine and pool time, it should have been a lovely day that was completely marred by things going on at the office. I felt absolutely awful about my mood and have sworn to myself that it won't happen again. My parents came from 1300 miles away, and they deserve me at my best, not the crabbiness that infested me yesterday.

And so here we are today, with only two full days left. I was supposed to join them on a river cruise this afternoon, and life had other plans. So, tonight we'll do dinner and tomorrow brings a swamp tour. And me in a better mood. It makes me sad that 60 hours from now I'll be on a plane to LA and they'll still be here. Yes, I'm sacrificing time with my family because of my job. It'll never happen again, because at the end of the day, family will always be there, jobs will come and go.

100 random facts....

1. I'm a terrible liar.
2. I have incredible beginner's luck.
3. My nickname (name) is in reference to my father's favorite Stooge.
4. I do 95% of my shopping online. I hate shopping with the exception of the grocery store.
5. I could eat Thai food and gyros every day of the week and never be sick of them. And ice cream..
6. I don't intend to reproduce.
7. If I had $5 for every time someone said "oh, you'll change your mind about that", I'd likely be retired by now. Without kids.
8. I have clown feet.
9. I want to join the mile high club.
10. I never thought I'd have any use for e-mail on my phone, but I cannot live without my iPhone.
11. My favorite painting is "Nighthawks".
12. Skydiving is the coolest rush I've ever had.
13. I'm a sports freak.
14. I've never broken a bone.
15. I've given up on trying to impress people.
16. Flying bugs and birds terrify me.
17. I've been on TV, the radio and in a movie.
18. I don't think I can count the number of famous people I've met.
19. I didn't used to get along very well with my mother, but it's gotten much better.
20. My father is one of my best friends.
21. It takes a very long time to get to know "the real Me".
22. All of my closest friends could blackmail me.
23. My favorite food is anything of the Mediterranean variety.
24. I do not have a Minnesota accent. I am starting to acquire a southern one though.
25. I am the only child of my parents. My siblings are amazing.
26. I take exceptional care of my hair.
27. I think Krav Maga is the hardest thing I've ever attempted.
28. I can't do anything cool with my face, like raise one eyebrow or roll my tongue.
29. I sleep on satin sheets - one of the best purchases I've ever made.
30. I own my dream shoes.
31. My favorite photo of myself is my first day of kindergarten. My second favorite photo...well, you'll see it if you're lucky.
32. I have zero artistic talent. Stick figures are impossible for me.
33. My left hand is pretty useless for anything other than typing.
34. I'm usually extremely shy, and my job forces me to be outgoing. Alcohol also works.
35. I still sleep with my baby blanket.
36. I dream of beating Ken Jennings and Eddie the Blind Guy on Jeopardy. I'm undefeated at Jeopardy on PS2.
37. I will bet on anything.
38. My underwear always match my bra.
39. I can go over a month without doing a single load of laundry and without wearing the same outfit twice.
40. I love cats but am extremely allergic to them.
41. I share a b-day with George Clooney and Sigmund Freud.
42. I'm claustrophobic in elevators, sleeping bags and crowds of people.
43. I refuse to write with a pen that's any color than black.
44. I have slept in my car on more than one occasion.
45. I have a beer named after me.
46. I have a 36" inseam.
47. I miss Phil Hartman.
48. My favorite color is blue.
49. I buy a different kind of cheese every time I go to the grocery store.
50. I have developed a serious case of insomnia since moving away from home.

51. I knew within a week of working at my first hotel, that this was the career I wanted.
52. The best thing to do when I'm mad is leave me alone.
53. I hate people that don't know how to drive.
54. Slow people also irritate me.
55. My favorite band is DMB.
56. I snore. And talk in my sleep.
57. I've never camped out for tickets to anything, but I have camped out for beer.
58. I can do an impression of Apu. And that's it.
59. I love to cook.
60. I interrupted MC Hammer's dinner at Glamorama.
61. I'm not nearly as witty as I would have you all believe.
62. I was born a blonde.
63. I will get liposuction someday.
64. You can tell how drunk I was the night before by how many times I throw up the next day.
65. I have a Magic 8 Ball in my office. You can tell if it's working by asking "is Moe going to hell?".
66. I have made it halfway through my list of places to go before I die - Ireland has been checked off, Greece remains.
67. My favorite song to sing for karaoke is "Copacabana".
68. I've been on the Jumbo-tron at the Metrodome (both football and baseball), the Target Center, Target Field and the X.
69. It perturbs me when people say they'll call you back, but don't. I am frequently guilty of this.
70. I want to throw someone else's steak at a cyclist and I want to throw a Molotov Cocktail at an abandoned brick building.
71. I refuse to spend more than $50 on a shirt, but will cough up $300 for shoes without batting an eye.
72. I'm extremely shy - ISTJ.
73. I have two collections of shot glasses: One for places I've been and one for places others go.
74. My goal is have them match by the time I die.
75. I'm the nerd of my friends.
76. I have managed to buy one thing and one thing only at Target.
77. I may be the only female on the planet that doesn't crave chocolate.
78. I am deathly afraid of never being able to ski again.
79. I walked around the set of 'Days of Our Lives'.
80. J-Lo is my guilty pleasure.
81. My idea of coffee is a double espresso.
82. I have been classified as a flirt.
83. Cranium is my favorite game.
84. I do not own a TV.
85. I dance better alone.
86. If I could take back one moment of my life, it would be the moment I sold my U2 tickets right before the show.
87. As much as I enjoy being single, I miss the little things about having a boyfriend.
88. I've worn a coconut bra and grass skirt - it's a funny story.
89. One of my many nicknames is "Fun Moe". $1 if you get the reference.
90. I hate Jaeg, but love Jaeg-bombs.
91. My favorite bar is Brit's Pub.
92. I tried out for "The Weakest Link".

93. I've mastered the recipe for lemon ricotta pancakes from Hell's Kitchen.
94. Apparently I am the reason Surly cans Coffee Bender.
95. My "list" includes more women than men.
96. I miss being able to see stars.

97. I'll rarely admit it, but I'm a closet romantic.

98. Selling everything I owned that didn't fit in my car was one of the most freeing moments of my life..
99. I would fail miserably on the Atkin's Diet. But I'm going to try. Have to look hot for sister's wedding
100. I have the most amazing friends and family anyone could ever hope to have.

I am so ready for some football!!!!!

OMG! Football season is finally here!!!! And, guess what? My first game of the season was the FIRST game of the season!! Let's start at the beginning, shall we? I started looking for jobs towards the end of 2009. I had found a couple that I wanted, but wasn't super serious about finding a new job. I mean, I had a great Monday through Friday gig that paid me well and I had the most amazing boss I think I've ever had in my life. Who'd want to give that up?!

So I moved the job hunt to the back burner and got through the holiday season. I kind of kept looking, here and there when I had a free minute at work. I found a dream job, but when I went back to post for it, it was gone. After the first of the year, I was going through some personal crap and just said eff it. The winter sucked the life out of me and I decided that when I got back from Mexico, the first thing I was going to do was re-dedicate myself to finding something, anything that wasn't in the state of MN. At this point I didn't care if it was Cambodia or Columbus. I just needed to leave. And then this job almost jumped out of the website at me. New Orleans? Could I live there? Could I deal with the humidity and the crime and the (gasp) hurricanes? In typical me fashion, I walked into my boss' office and asked if she cared if I posted for it. She said no, so I did.

Obviously I got the job, or I wouldn't be here. Somewhere during the interview process, the NFL released it's 2010 schedule. Lo and behold, the first game of the season is at the Superdome. On a Thursday. Against the Vikings. In the process of the job hunt, I wasn't super sold on NoLA, but once I saw this, I figured there was something else going on and I had to go. I wanted to be at this game. I needed to be at this game. So, job taken, and the hunt for tickets was on.

Fast forward to last week. I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's not what you know, it's who you know. I'd been badgering my friend all summer to come down for the game, and wouldn't you know it, my friend Chris was the lucky guest of honor along with a couple of his friends. They all happen to have a friend that works for the Vikings. A friend that hooked us up with tickets to the game, gratis. And somehow finagled on field passes for the pre-game!! Are you effing kidding me? I'm seriously one of the luckiest girls on the planet.

They all arrived Wednesday, we went out to dinner and hit Bourbon Street (of course!). Had an awesome time as always with them; it's easy because they're awesome. Thursday was the big day. I met up with them at their hotel and pre-gamed for a bit, then hopped in a cab to the Superdome. I'm not gonna lie, it's pretty impressive. I've driven by it countless times, but when you're standing on the street next to it, wow. We found our way in and found our way to the field. I had goosebumps and a smile the size of Texas when we walked out on that field.

There really isn't any way to describe the feeling of walking out on an NFL field before the game. In the industry I'm in, I've been around my fair share of famous people, including countless athletes, and I'm generally not one to get star struck. But seriously, this was different. There was the Thursday night game crew that included Tony Dungy, Brett Favre was on the field, Roger Goddell, Chris Paul. I was in heaven. I even got to catch an NFL football pass from Chris. I really can't describe it. It was one of those amazing once in a lifetime things.

About a half hour before kickoff, they booted us from the sidelines and up to our seats we went. All the way up. Literally. Last row in the upper level. We were on about the 45 yard line, so they weren't too bad, and there was a restroom literally right behind our seats (awesome). The crowd was super fun and didn't give us too much crap about being Vikings fans. There were a couple guys from MN near us, so I shared a Surly with them (duh! of course I snuck one in!). All in all, it was a great night with seriously kick ass people. Thanks to Ryan for the tickets and to Chris, Ryan and Andy for coming down and letting me be a part of the fun. You guys rock and hopefully we'll have drinks when I'm back in the 612 in November.

This might be....

....the absolute sweetest thing I've ever read.

I can't even stand it. I'm going out on a limb here....one I rarely go out on. I hate admitting it, but I'm truly a closeted romantic. I've been single for a loooooong time, too long. Sorry Big, you don't factor in here, and we both know why. I love you though. :)

I know what I want in life. I knew it when I was a bright eyed 19 year old applying for a front desk job at an extended stay hotel. I wanted to see the world and retire at our Aruba property. At the time I just said it, because I thought it sounded good. This lofty, ridiculously unattainable goal that I'd never achieve, but would get me this job, in this moment, because I needed one.

Until the moment I packed up my car and started the trek down here, I never actually believed I'd ever get out of Minnesota. That'd I'd settle and be married and be comfortable for comfort's sake. I want to live in New York. I want to live in Ireland. I want to see and experience everything this world has to offer in my lifetime. But I didn't ever think it would happen. I really didn't. But knowing now, that I'm able to pack up my life and just go, it truly feels like it could be a reality. It makes me believe. It's ignited a passion in me like I've never felt before.

It makes me sad. I makes me sad that I missed the birth of my newest nephew. It makes me sad that I missed the funeral of Uncle Bill, the one that always picked on me when I was a child. It makes me sad because it isolates me from the people I care about so deeply I can't stand the thought of being without them. It makes me sad because I'm alone. I know in my heart I'm not, I have so many friends and family members that would do anything for me (and I the same for them), but physically I'm alone.

Back to the closeted romantic.....I honestly think I'd die if someone wrote a column like that to me. I want the kind of relationship he speaks of. I want my best friend and partner there by my side. I want the fairy tale ending, even if it's a hair different than the "typical" fairy tale ending. And because of where I want my life to go, and the things I want to achieve, I have this undeniable feeling that I'm going to have to achieve all of it on my own. Without that one solid person in life that will always be there for me. It's because of my drive and my unwillingness to sacrifice those things I want. I've never been good at compromise, I mean sure, I will, but when it comes to my dreams, I can't see myself giving them up for anyone. Nor would I want anyone else to for me. Scratch that, of course I would, but if they did, I wouldn't respect them.

I close myself off from it because it's safer that way. If I think about it objectively, it doesn't matter. There's a line in a song, "I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all". Not me. I'd rather feel nothing at all. It's easier to not feel than it is to think about what I really want and not having it and hurting because the only person I have to blame for it is me.

It's quite the conundrum.....having the life that I crave and the passion to do it, but not being able to share it with that special someone. I know there's a balance, but I haven't found it yet, and the thought that I might not ever....well....makes me sad. It doesn't make me question the way I lead my life, because I'd rather live now. I'm not sure which is worse, regretting all the things I could have had, or all the things I didn't. I try to lead a life without regret - a good friend once said it best - don't regret anything in life, because at the time, it was exactly what you wanted. And to this point, I've gotten exactly what I've wanted at the time, and if it wasn't what I wanted, I learned from it and changed future decisions. I want that balance so badly, it just seems so far away....

So send me flowers or something. And thank you, Andrew Cohen, for letting me know that it's possible.

Success!!

I have successfully completed my first big, complex group! Not ever, but first since I jumped back into the event planning arena. I didn't realize it until this week, how much I missed being in front of guests and making them smile. It's true in every aspect of my life - all I want to do is make people happy. I'm good at itand I enjoy it immensely. There is no greater satisfaction to me in life, than to know that I had a hand in making someone's day.

This group was awesome. It's a foundation run by a Major League All Star. It's a foundation that provides scholarships to exceptional students. To qualify, they have to be a high school student with a 3.5 GPA or better and do some type of extra-curricular activity, be it a sport or a club. They also must do a certain amount of community service. The group is based out of two cities, and this is the first time they've traveled out of their respective communities to do service projects. They picked New Orleans because of all that's happened here - built a baseball field, created a playground, made furniture and trash can holders for the Boys and Girls clubs, etc. All in all, a spectacular group of kids.

The planners are amazing as well. I truly hope they come back to NOLA - for fun or with this group again. I now have even more people to visit when I go to my favorite city on the planet. It's amazing to me to see the smile in my client's face when I say "Yes, we can do that" to even the most impossible task. There's truly nothing like it. I can't take all the credit though. Despite some initial skepticism, the team that I work with and for is incredible. Without each and every one of them, I wouldn't be able to confidently say, "Yes, we can do that" to those impossible tasks. I don't and will never take each of these people for granted. I work for an amazing company that only employs the finest. I'm grateful for that beyond words.

I may have my moments of "what was I thinking?!", but I really do love what I do, and where I'm doing it. I don't plan to be here forever, but I am going to enjoy every moment of it, even the crappy ones. That which doesn't kill us only makes us stronger, right?

Whew.

I have just arrived home from my first official big catering function - a family reunion for about 100 people. Overall it went well - the client was extremely happy....but there were a couple of bumps in the road that I will address with the appropriate personnel.

The last couple weeks have been an absolute blast. I had a couple of super downer moments, none of which I will get into here. Yet. You like reading about the fun stuff anyway. I'll roll back to a couple Tuesdays ago, when I was greeted with my first Minnesota faces. My friend Angel was here for a conference and brought her friend Karen with. It was sooooooo unbelievably nice to have some familiarity in my life. We met up for dinner and a stroll down Bourbon. Hit up the Funky Pirate Bar to see Big Al Carson - who's AWESOME! TONS of laughs were had and I'm super sad they're gone now.

My Thursday plans got switched to Wednesday...we were going to check out this super cool wine bar, but decided on a night in front of the TV instead. It's a place called W.I.N.O - Wine Institute of New Orleans. You buy a card or start a tab, and you're able to sample 1, 2 or 4 oz. pours of 120 different wines. They have an amazing cheese selection and the hummus is To. Die. For. I'm blanking on what I did that Thursday...when it comes to me I shall recap it.

Friday was back to the Quarter. My friends were still in town, so we met at my hotel, had a couple drinks and apps, gave them a tour and then embarked on our evening. The original plan was to meander down Royal Street, stopping at whatever struck our fancy for an app and a drink. Of course, we detoured off our plan, and right into a Pimm's Cup at some hotel bar. Not just any hotel bar, but a rotating hotel bar. Yes, it's kitschy, but it was pretty cool. I had been there previously with a friend, and while it took some getting used to, overall it was a pretty cool experience. We were going to hit up an Irish Pub down the street, but ended up grabbing Mexican food at Felipe's. It's like Chipotle, only better and cheaper. We were going to try to avoid Bourbon street, but we ended up meeting some other friends of theirs at the Cat's Meow. I believe I've recapped the rest of this evening in a previous post....

Saturday I picked up the girls at their hotel and we went out to a local (to me) bar to watch soccer and grab lunch. After recapping their week, we called a cab and they headed to the airport. I napped most of the rest of the afternoon (much needed) and had resigned myself to an evening home alone. Welcome to Loserville, population Me. Around 10 in the evening, a colleague called asking if I had any interest in going out with some new people at work. Let me check my calendar....um....YES! We met at Rendezvous bar (fitting, no?), and from there to Balcony Bar (where the infamous kickball drinkoff took place the week prior). From there we were whisked away to Monkey Hill where they had a decent band playing and then finished up that portion of the evening at Philips.

I'm used to going out for happy hour, and being home, in bed, asleep by 10 at night usually. Even on weekend. Here however, no one really goes out until late (like 11), and since the bars don't really close, they stay out until the sun comes up. This does not make for any sort of rational sleeping habits, I tell you. Anyway, I met up with the girl I was supposed to live with when I moved here and we played Apples to Apples with some of her friends until the wee hours of the morning. It was super fun, and great to meet some new people. Sunday I slept in, was a horribly lazy bum, and eventually made it out to the kickball fields. Joined a friend for ice cream and had an early night.

This past week has absolutely flown by. Actually, the two months I've been here have been an absolute blur. Last week was filled with kickball and doctors appointments and soccer and cocktails. I was sadly unable to play the first week of kickball this week - hopefully next week I'll be back to normal. My team is super fun as is the whole league. It's in a different part of town than I normally hang out, so it's nice to see a new part of the city. Had a massive heart to heart with a colleague who I hope I can trust, took a trip back to being a kid and watched Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and had a bunch of ice cream and pastries. I really need to watch what I'm eating around here...all this rich food has the potential to result in not so happy things for me.

All in all, its been another amazing couple of weeks. This weekend is filled with the Running of the Bulls, soccer, kickball, more soccer and perhaps even Despicable Me. My knee is getting better by the hour (though that could be the painkillers my orthopedist gave me), so hopefully I'll be back in the Krav studio by Tuesday and contributing to our kickball team in some other way that beer drinking and clapping.

Did I mention the "Slap Cuzzies"??? If not, they're awesome on many, many levels.

This will not destroy me....

It will make me stronger! Cliché, cliché, cliché. I’m a walking, talking, living, breathing cliché. Of course, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I’m also a ridiculous blonde sometime, most recently in the sense that I completely blew off a site tour at another hotel to watch soccer. Really?! I neglected to put it in my Outlook calendar; if it’s not in my Outlook calendar, it doesn’t exist. I felt awful about it, especially considering what transpired in the interim (future blog post), but because it was at one of our sister properties. Eventually the sales guy made it to the happy hour spot and I bought him a couple beers to smooth things over. How ridiculously unprofessional of me.

We all departed and with my plans for the evening in the same place my phone was a couple months ago (the toilet for those not in the know), I could have sat home and moped about. Instead, I went and had dinner at our hotel bar, and discovered a new bar in a new part of town.

At the Mono concert a couple of weeks ago, a fellow fan and I were discussing music in general and where to go to see it. Music is one thing that is definitely not lacking in this town. He mentioned that there was a similar band playing the following week called “This Will Destroy You” at a bar in the Bywater called Saturn Bar (though for some reason I always want to call it Sunset Bar). I decided to hell with it, I was going to go enjoy some decent live music. Even if it was by myself.

And enjoy I did. They were awesome. A little more rock-y than Mono, but the sound was great. The bar was slightly too small for a stage, so they were actually playing in the audience. I didn’t catch the name of the opening band, but met a couple of the members. Good guys and decent music. Overall, the night could have been a complete bust, but I made the most of it and ended up having a most delightful evening.

Amazing what a little positivity does to a person….

Good Deed of the Week

My first day on the job, our HR director let us know that she needed volunteers for a Habitat for Humanity build. As I'm new around here, and didn't see anything pressing on my agenda, I said I'd be happy to. From what I've heard about it, painting was going to be about as "manual labor" as I would have to get.

My assistant picked me up, and I navigated. Apparently it was in a part of town she'd never been (AKA: not the best part). We arrived on time, she introduced me to some people, we got our shirts and then we gathered. The area General Managers spoke and then we were given our tasks. Mine was not painting. Ugh. You mean I was going to have to pick up a shovel?!?

And so it was. We had to shovel out 6" deep for an 8' wide driveway, all the way to the sidewalk. Thankfully there was a sidewalk already there, so we didn't have to dig that too. We had to cut boards for stakes to mark where we were shoveling. We had to make the ground higher near the house and slope it down towards the sidewalk. Something about rain and drainage around here?? I have never seen my hands in worse shape than they were over the weekend. They still haven't completely healed.

Overall it was a great experience. I met a lot of people that work for various hotels and expanded my network just a little bit. I did something good for someone less fortunate than me for no reason at all. However, I will limit my volunteering in the future to the events where I get to see the appreciation on the recipients face. I know that volunteering is supposed to be done completely selflessly and all that, but the truth of the matter is that I get out of it just as much as the recipient does. But I want to see them appreciate it. It may sound selfish, but it's that gratefulness and appreciation that drives me and makes me want to do more. Do it more often, do it for longer, recruit others to the cause, whatever that cause may be. I don't donate money to non-profits, but will round up the best silent auction donation items you'll ever see (and likely even bid on them!). I'm happy to put a contact from a worthy cause in touch with a decision maker. This H4H build though....first and last. I'll be supportive and whatever, but I'd love to see what that house (or any other H4H builds) looks like a year or two or ten after we've put our time and sweat equity into it.

I know that last sentence sounds extremely cynical, and not in the same vein as the rest of the post. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure the majority of recipients of H4H homes appreciate them and take care of them until they get back on their feet. As such, I'll stick to the group I love working with the most: Special Olympics. I'd give up any day/night of my life to help this organization.

Week. Over.

It's been a ride, that's for sure. I received my first groups, my first pop-up groups, my first frustrations, my first offer of a date (declined), my first concert tickets purchased, and first day of sweating out a hangover (literally).

I'll write more over the weekend, but I want to say that yesterday was somewhat of an epiphany for me. I've received a few e-mails and calls from friends expressing sadness that I'm not making the trip back in June, and that my trip in August is pretty much booked. I want all of you to know that whatever you're feeling, I'm feeling it 100 times worse. Those that know me well, know that the absolute last thing in life I want to do is let someone down. And I know I do it a lot. And every time it happens, it tears me up inside. I over commit myself and then everyone suffers.

I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I want to be there in June. And I want to be available in August. My entire life of friends and family are going to be crammed into two nights there, and it sucks. It really, really sucks. I know I'm going to forget something, or someone, and I hate it.

Sorry to be so morose today....it was a bit of a rough couple of days, and this morning didn't help the situation. I promise I'll be more upbeat in future posts. I miss and love all of you.

~Moe